Broken Pieces Together Again

It feels as of late someone has took my world and turned it upside down. I  think I take 10 steps forward and then something takes me off guard I go 30 steps back. My emotions have been all over the place since July. I have a problem with eating my emotions I have come to realize. I worked so hard to lose the weight I was 130lb and I was still working on losing more weight. I felt really great about myself and then we found out we were pregnant which was wonderful news. Then July that all changed no more baby. I didn't care what I ate if it took away the pain for a little while then great. I think I ate icecream almost every night. I love hamburgers my fav. food and if I was out running errands I always made it a point to stop and get one. McDonald's became my best friend=)  Then I would get mad at myself because I knew I would start to gain weight. I started to notice my jeans getting a little tighter which made me even more depressed. I also knew this isn't the food my husband and I wanted Deano eating all the time.  So this Monday came and I decided to take my health back into my hands I am no longer going to eat junk because it really didn't make me feel better. I am back on my diet to get to the weight that makes me happy. I have also had two knee surgeries so I need to watch my weight for that too. One day we might try for another baby and I need to be in my best health to carry one. So it feels good to have some control over my life.

  I have also decided to give God control of my life. When something slaps me in the face that hurts I am going to give it up to him and just everyday stuff. I have come to realize I am not doing to good dealing with all this myself but that's why he is their so I don't have to do it all by myself. I know I will still have those days that I get sad, mad, isn't fair and go this just SUCKS!! And I know he already knows that I feel that way and is their to give me comfort. I feel broken right now but I know with him helping me I can put all the pieces back together.

 "I can do all this through him who gives me strength" Philippians 4:13(NIV)
" I can do all things through Christ which strengthenth me" same verse just in King James Bible

I have also decided to stop asking the y questions. She is pregnant while I was why did she get to keep hers and not me?? Why did you give that family a children when all they do is mistreat them?? She is drinking and doing drugs and your giving her a baby why?? I could go on forever with the y questions. I don't know why but its not for me to figure out and it only hurts me to keep asking why. I know God has a big picture and one day I will know it.